Friday the 13th

Let me say that any and all emotions and sympathy I will ever have to characters in movies is thrown out the window based on the people cast in the roles. In this movie, there are 8 that I felt sympathy for or cared about and four of them were individual tits.

Put it this way, anybody in the movie with shaggy looking curly hair, like a heart throb from abercrombie (EVERY fucking dude in the movie), I hope gets killed in a brutal way as soon as I see them. That left two dudes to not mind, and they were an Asian and a black dude who wound up fitting every cliché imaginable anyways.

So all you characters that look like you belong in the partridge family, a hip and cool rock band, or next to Seth Rogen and his "awesome" Jew fro, I enjoyed watching you die.

The movie itself had some fat fake tits flopping around. Generic characters that have to fill the same roles that every modern horror or comedy has like why is it everyone is a pothead? Whatever. I will stop ranting about how I hated everybody in the movie.

Jason himself was pretty good. I'm not a diehard by any means so it doesn't upset me that whoever plays Jason is an anonymous person behind a mask each time. So Kane Hodder and all your fans can keep whining, cause if your a big guy you too can be a masked murderer in the next Friday the 13th. Seriously you can't tell the difference anyways. Jason was as badass as ever. He was brutal and honestly I loved the fact that he was more intense and runnin around.

The story is pretty non existent. Teenagers go camping. A girl goes missing. More teenagers go camping and one looks for his sister. Jason watches tits bounce around and practices his archery. That's that. But who watches slashers for the story anyway?

As for the whole remake and reimagining obsession for movies, I don't have a problem with it like some people. It doesn't ruin the original movie younalready know. Sometimes a movie could use an update for a new generation as the classics have pretty low production value, horrible music and effects and so forth so why not do it again. Sometimes it works like the new Texas Chainsaw. I loved that and hatednthe original. Sometimes it's entertaining but the original wins out like Halloween (really Rob Zombie, does every character in your movies need to be disgusting white trash whores?) but overall they are there for a newer crowd who may not be as frightened by the originals ecause by this point in time we've seen a lot crazier stuff in our movies.

So if you like these movies you'll like this as it is what it is.